big, stewy mess

I've been a bit messy on the inside for a few weeks and it was just tonight that it hit me. It hit me that I have so much stuff spinning around in my head and in my heart. So many issues -- surface, and way, way below. And, it's hard to figure anything out when another issue keeps coming up and another and another and pretty soon it's a big stewy mess. Oh, isn't life fun? Man, I guess God never said it would be easy.

The beginning and the end

They say that people remember the first thing and the last thing... that's why programming for things like recitals is so important. Or, why we generally over-rehearse the opening and closing of a work. I'm thinking that maybe that is also true for days. Or at least my day today. This morning started out great with Starbucks and seeing what I can only explain as a baby raccoon on a leash. Hey, I only report what I see! Then, somewhere between that and 7pm, there was a minor work tragedy that I won't detail here b/c I'm just beginning to experience a duller pain. But, then tonight, I went to a birthday gathering for Elizabeth (who is fabulous, by the way!) and I had a really good time. I thought I would be in a pseudo-crappy mood, but it was exactly what I needed. We had conversations about our hometowns and how to get free tickets to stuff and the probability of Hyla surviving the Peace Corps. It was pretty awesome. As is Elizabeth, the birthday girl! Happy Birthday, Ms. Fabulous!
So, the beginning of today was good... and the ending was good. The middle was somewhat questionable, but we'll leave that for what it is. On to Friday!

Big shout-out to Dell

I requested a new charger/AC adapter for my laptop last night via chat at approx. 6:15pm. My charger was on my desk by 2:40pm today! I love my service agreement! Thanks, Dell!
(and, yes, Stephen - you could say, "easy as dell")

Yay Dell!

My charger (AC adapter) for my laptop died so I contacted Dell since I have the super-duper warranty and service agreement. They're sending me a new one!
Yay!! That was easy!

GJF, Vol next-to-last

Well, we thought today would be our last day for jury duty, but we got called back for yet another day. It's like the never-ending jury duty!

In other news, I didn't run into anyone today. hmmm....

A new series

One of my favorite things about living in the city and commuting via foot and metro is running into people randomly in the course of a day. So, for a week (or maybe two -- we'll see), I'm going to log my running-intos. So, here we go.
This morning, on the metro, I ran into Pat, from our grand jury.
Then, on the other side of the metro, I ran into Sarah, also from our grand jury.
On the way back to the metro, I saw a former board member (he didn't acknowledge me).
Tonight, I ran into another Sarah on the metro (this one is a musician I know from church).
Then, when I was almost home, a familiar green car drove by... with Amy!

Today's random highlights

This morning, I heard a new announcement on metro. (my paraphrase) "Metro now has new, more secure trash cans. So, throw out your trash without fear." What? Um.... was this a problem? Were people fearful when they threw out their trash?

I did my laundry tonight and it was cause to celebrate. drum roll please...... Both of my dryers worked on the first try!! That is a sheer miracle.

And, now smashed eggs with goat cheese, asparagus and sweet corn. yummy (It was supposed to be an omelet, but um, apparently, I haven't yet acquired omelet skills.)

The silver lining...

on the cloud where I always lose my phone is that when I leave the charger at my brother's house, I have 2 or 3 extras at home!

An Open Letter

I hate that you never pass me as I walk home anymore.
I hate that we never run into each other outside the building anymore.
I hate that when I yell your name outside the window, no one yells back.
I admit it, I miss you.
I miss our late night giggle-fests.
I miss seeing your green car in the questionable parking spot.
Maybe we could at least have a date night.

Defy expectation

Every once in a while, I pine for that American dream of a house and a marriage and a dog and 2.67 kids. Today's one of those days. It just hit me suddenly. I was scrolling through a couple blogs of my friends and I was hit with some pangs of jealousy of my friends that are getting married and another who posted adorable pictures of their kids peering out the window. I guess I'm allowed to think about it every once in a while.
And, now I'll just shove the lump back down my throat and go on in my life of strength where I am independent and get to do my own thing and live my life differently... the life where I have frequent culinary experiments, I can work as late as I want and move at the drop of a hat. I'm not trying to fulfill the expectations of my parents or even the expectations of my youth. I'm just living my life full and experimentally. Perhaps that's what's so nice about the grow up - get married- have kids - stay in one place ideal. There's a template to follow -- there's some security in that. I have no template. Just a challenge.

Weekend home

Weekends at home always present me with mixed emotions. Nostalgia, longing for natural beauty wonder about what it would be like to live around family, annoyance with the bizarro accent (and annoyance with the fact that even though I grew up there, I cannot duplicate it), frustration with the general pace of life. But, then once I slow down enough to be inside the life instead of watching them live as I whiz by, the nostalgia grows and I have fantasies about moving back and opening music studios and a great cafe and going home at night to pick fresh vegetables out of my garden and grilling them on the huge patio on the back of my house that I could actually afford. And, then I think I'm crazy that I would just go nuts and I dismiss it all. The fantasy becomes more and more detailed every time I go home, though. This time, it involved me becoming a regular at a couple good restaurants within 30-minutes' drive and finding a church that would work for me.
But, I digress...
I actually just wanted to check in and post that I was glad I was able to spend a few days with my parents. They are having a bit of a rough time and although they didn't let me see their emotion, I know this is hard for them and they feel a lot of responsibility to care for Chris and Andy (the neighbors). In other news, my father built this really cool fire pit and we sat out there around a fire on Friday night and roasted marshmallows and he told me about his trips to Montana. It was soo good. Anything that gets my father telling stories is cool. Just one question, why no firepit when I was at home? That would have been awesome. Anyways, I was glad I got home.
It also gave me a chance to get inside my head... I have a tendency to get very "thinky" when I'm at home. I was able to get through another layer of processing. I still don't know how this will all shake out, but I'm getting somewhere with the processing, I think.