(Warning: Some of you will have no idea what this post is talking about and others will know exactly.)
The worst of all the catch-words: closure.
I resisted for seven years. More than seven years, actually. But, I had to do it. I had to take physical steps to move toward emotional wholeness in this area of my life. For seven years, I've carted around a box, marked with his initials, filled with the souvenirs of our relationship. Once I tried to burn the contents to no avail. But, tonight, I emptied it. I threw out the letters, the printed emails, the rose he brought me when we first met and the pictures. Well, most of the pictures. There's one still sitting on my desk. I'll throw it out before I go to bed tonight. I just needed a few minutes.
I just threw all the letters out. I didn't read them. It was SO tempting, but I didn't. He is (was?) a hugely important person in my life-story, but that chapter ended (several times!!) and so it's time to truly move on. Now that we've been out of communication for several months, I figured it was time. So, tonight, through some real, authentic tears, I got rid of every piece of him I was holding onto.
Sometimes, I wonder.... But, I can't. I have to just move on. And, claim closure.
(Also, to be clear- I have a great relationship with Chris and love him to death - this is a separate issue entirely.)
6 comments:
"and that is what they call cul-o-sure."
congrats :-)
I'm one of those "no idea who this is about" people, but it doesn't matter.
You took a big step. Congratulations and hugs.
Since you closed that part of life... why don't we open a bottle of wine soon!
I have had to do the same thing....you will learn how cleansing this process is. I know it was a huge step, I am happy and sad with you. Gail
Good for you...
I'm happy for you. I understand your feelings. I just gave away my wedding dress and veil (without putting it on first). Congrats on this big step.
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