moving on

Well, for some reason, that last super-long post froze my blogging efforts. I'm not sure why I haven't posted in so long. I've been busy, but I think, even more than that, I just didn't feel like I had anything worth posting. That's probably not a good thing. It probably means that I am feeling neither hot nor cold about anything. That's not good at all. Oh well, more will well up inside me soon, I am sure.

upclose with my week...REALLY upclose

I've had a busy, good week and I'd just like to share a little bit of it so sorry if this gets a little news-y. The last two weeks seem a bit blurr-ish since I was away last weekend. It makes it seem as though it's been one long week rather than two. But, that's besides the point, I suppose. The point is that this week I had five very different evenings, but all quite nice. Monday evening, I went to my community group. I'm just really starting to get a feel for my place in that group and it's nice. I feel like I've been there long enough that I can kind of be "one of the group" and try to make the newer people feel more welcome. I'm really surprised how comfortable I am there, though. I must admit that I am fighting the urge to leave and go to another small group. I'm not entirely sure why. I like that group...I really do, but I have some sort of flight sickness, I think. But, I need to stay. Anyways, we had a good discussion, albeit a difficult one and that was good.
Tuesday, I was looking forward to occupying my couch for the evening, but then Jeremy asked if I wanted to go do something so we went and had dinner. I'm so glad we did because it was just really nice to chill and spend time with him... never mind the half-hour search for bunny-friendly restaurants, the mediocre tapas (but yummy sangria!) and our completely inattentive (and slightly sexist) server. Acutally, that all was probably what made the night enjoyable... spontaneity, unpredictability, and good company.
Wednesday.... um, yeah, wednesday was a not so good date, but a decent story...let's just say I shoved money in the server's hand and said, "just in case he's cheap".
Thursday...I was looking forward to this for weeks. I went to hear the NSO play Corigliano's symphony #1 (the AIDS symphony). I didn't even know what was being programmed in the first half until I got there. Turns out it was Brahms' Tragic Overture and the Bruch violin concerto. Brahms was nice as Brahms usually is (don't get me wrong, sometimes it's exquisite, but usually, it's nice), but I forgot how much I enjoy Bruch. His melodies are so well-spun and it's not difficult to understand and appreciate...that's nice sometimes...especially when you know there is a Corigliano soon to follow. But, the violinist did a really nice job...not over-romanticized or over-emoted, just beautiful. Before I move on to the Corigliano, a quick note...I was sitting in the second row because I got a comp ticket from an acquantance and beggars can't be choosers. Just for reference, if you go to a concert in the Kennedy Center Concert Hall, don't sit in the first 5 rows. I was used to the Kimmel Center in Philly where even the first few rows are good...close, but good. Not so in the Concert Hall... the first rows = neck kink. Just a word of advice. Now, on to Corigliano, I did move back a bit prior to the symphony...thank god! If you've ever heard this piece, you know that it is percussion heavy and loud, loud, loud at points. So, even in the 12th row, it was almost too close...should have sat in the tiers for this one. Regardless, it was performed fairly well. I think I'm spoiled, though. Philadelphia's orchestra is truly amazing, especially their winds and brass. The NSO just isn't there yet. I guess I just expected more from Slatkin and this orchestra on this piece since they recorded it and won a grammy for it and all. And, actually, I liked the recording as I recall. But, it was still a good performance...a different performance, of course, but a good one. The main draw to this concert for me was that John Corigliano was there engaging in an after-concert discussion. It was interesting. I didn't really hear anything earth-shattering, but it is always interesting to hear musicians relate as philosophers and most importantly, people. I, of course, wimped out and didn't ask my question. Doh! I was afraid it was too "heady". Oh well, hopefully, I haven't lost my chance forever. Ok, sorry about the rambling on this one.
Friday...I had a crappy day at work. I was tired from being too social all week and by the end of the day, I just wanted to cry and sleep. However, I had told someone I would go see a movie. So, I went home and turned out the lights, turned on Nora Jones and lit a stress-relief candle (yes, I really have one). I laid down and listened to the music and the rain outside my window and soon everything was once again right with the world. It's amazing how little things can make the biggest difference. So, then after the muck of my day was washed off of my brain and spirit, I made my way toward Gallery Place for a movie. We watched Serenity. I had heard lots of good things about both the movie and the series it was based on (thanks to Colleen, Nathaniel, Dave and other random sources). However, I hate to break it to you all... not terribly impressed. Perhaps the series was really great, I don't know. I should enter a disclaimer here, though. We were sitting in the fourth row...we got into the theater a little later than we should have and it was a Friday night so the viewing experience may not have been optimal. So, once again, the experience was thwarted by neck-craning. That's the story of my week, I guess.
Thanks for sticking with me the whole way to the end.

a little recognition

I'd just like to give a shout-out to some people I'd like to thank:
First of all, thanks to all of the people that did not buy flights from DC to NY this weekend and in so doing, forced American Airlines to put their flights on sale at a ridiculously cheap price. I appreciate it.
Thanks to the random guy at the Octoberfest party for trying to salsa or tango or something with me. I know that I suck, but thanks for sticking it out with me for an entire song. Now I may actually attempt to learn.
Thanks especially to Jeni and Kent for making a good weekend a really great one! It was so fun to hang out with you guys!
A special thanks to God for making sure there weren't any clouds on Saturday and also for allowing me to see Philly from the top. You totally made my day.
And, finally, thanks to Caryl for introducing me to Trader Joe's pickles (and as a by-product, introducing me to Trader Joe's in general). They rock and my dinner wouldn't have been nearly as enjoyable this evening without them.

Monopoly houses on the way to Park Avenue

I love flying. I particularly love flying when I can see the ground below. On the flight from DC to NY on Saturday, I could see the ground the whole time. It was so cool to see how we basically followed the water the whole way there. I happened to look out the window at just the right time and saw the skyline of Philly. Well, I don't know if you can call it a skyline if you're looking at it from above, but it was the city, at least. It was cool because I know the area well enough that I could orient myself even from the sky. I could see where the new building near 30th Street station is and follow 611 up to where I used to live in Willow Grove. From that perspective, even the skyscrapers look like little monopoly houses. But, monopoly houses that I could identify! Sweet!

signing away rights

This morning, I officially signed away my right to have representation in congress. I am a bona fide, card-carrying DC resident, with a quadrant in my address and without a senator. There was this little clause on my voter registration that basically amounted to, "I hereby understand that I do not have the right to vote in any other state and therefore will not be represented in Congress." Ok, so it didn't really say that literally, but it might as well have. When I went to sign that, I really had to stop for a minute...it makes me mad, but I don't have a choice, really.... at least not legally. So, there you have it. I will now join the ranks of DC-ites that look forward (or dread, depending on your view) to mayorial elections. So much for rights.

Hey, I like Indian food!

Today, I tried Indian food for the first time in about five years. It was yummy! So, there's still a lot of things on the menu that looked scary, but I liked what I tried. Now, I must enter a disclaimer: the restaurant was a bit hoighty-toighty and the food seemed like mediterranean tapas with a curried twist, but I liked that. So, I guess I'm making progress, at least. Perhaps, I am ready to try actual bona fide Indian cuisine now. I won't hold my breath and I won't go too hungry. It will be nice not to have to recoil in fright when my friends suggest going out for Indian, though.

escalators and vertigo

So, today, I left work early for the first time in a really long time. I was so proud of myself for actually leaving early since I had been there late most nights for the last few weeks. So, I walked down to the metro and there was this huge line of people waiting to go down into the metro. Apparently, the escalators were broken and there was only one that could even be used as a staircase so there was a line wrapped around the block waiting to get down into the station. The metro guard-guy (I refuse to call them police.) told me it would be a 20-30 minute wait. So, I walked to Farragut North and got on there. Weird. How bizarre is that. Who would have thought that a simple escalator outage would have caused all of that.

And, while I'm commenting on bizarre things, I had a girl call today to order a subscription that asked for a specific locale because she has vertigo. I'm not entirely sure what vertigo feels like, but I have a feeling she probably shouldn't have purchased tickets in the second tier.

Velvet Elvis

So, a friend of mine recommended that I read a book called, "Velvet Elvis". If I had known it was a "God" book, I wouldn't have bothered borrowing it from him. I don't know why I didn't pick up on that...I mean we were talking about God stuff when he brought it up. Anyways, so I started it Thursday night and I just finished it today, two days later. I can't begin to say enough about this book. For the last two years or so, I've had all of these thoughts about how Christianity works in my life and in our society that I just couldn't effectively put into words. Things about my view of spirituality and specifically the cross-section between spirituality and Christianity. I had all of these amorphous thoughts about how blighted organized religion is and at the same time how necessary and God-mandated/condoned it is. Things about the fact that being a Jesus-follower doesn't mean being a rules follower, it's about freedom to be everything I was created to be... the ultimate reality. But, most of all, that questioning and stretching the rubber band of beliefs is necessary and beautiful. So, the point is that I've had trouble articulating this, but he did it. He did it in a creative, easy to understand, yet researched and defended way. Not to say this book answered my questions, but rather that he said about Christianity the very things I was thinking without the words. Reading this book, I felt like he put on paper my philosophy of Christianity. Of course there are things in there that don't perfectly resonate with me, but in some parts, I felt like I was reading my thoughts translated into English. I think that anyone that's ever considered, doubted, questioned, criticized, accepted Christianity should read this book. This is the first book written by a Christian about a Christian-y topic that I have ever liked. Really. Ok, I'm done. Just read it: Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell.

frazzledness, squirrels, and wire hangers

What an insanely busy week. By Thursday night, I felt so frazzled and disoriented, almost as though I wasn't even myself. Work was just insane this week. I knew I had a lot to get done, but I didn't anticipate all of the other little things that would sap my time one minute at a time. And then, somehow I had an obligation every night. I'm not entirely sure how this happened, but lately my weekdays have been chocked full with work and social stuff and then the weekends are the "open" times. Which, I guess is good...it gives me a little breathing room before the next crazy week begins. It's just weird because for a long time, I had plans every weekend and not during the week. Anyways, that's not the point. The point is that it's left me in a bit of a search for myself. Where is the Hyla I always knew? I'm not the frazzled, discombobulated (wow, I don't think I've ever written that word before and I have no idea how to spell it) go-through-the-motions kind of girl. Even when things are crazy, I process things and take time to watch a squirrel eat a nut. (Yes, I actually did that one day. It was awesome! You should make it a point to try to see that at some point in your life.) But, I felt like I was always five minutes late and had to press the next button, get on the next train, and come up with the next joke. But, now that I have a few minutes to process things a bit, I realize that I've somehow allowed life to attack me. I mean, they are things that are necessary and things that I love...like work and church stuff and music stuff, but they sort of usurped authority over my life and in the process have left little, if any, time to pursue the new things I want to be part of my life. My new goals. It doesn't look like the hectic-ness is going to stop anytime soon, though, so I may need to get creative about how to pursue those things. And, how to remain true to myself. Okay, I'm off now. I need to rig up some rods for my new file crate. I wonder if I could manipulate a wire hanger for that?

update: Yes, a wire hanger is actually quite easily manipulated into file rods. Happiness.

oreos for breakfast

For me, there is something so luxurious about eating oreos for breakfast. Something very indulgent....perhaps just disgustingly American (especially since I dunked them in milk to obtain that yummy soggy texture!) I feel like a kid whose parents are away for the weekend. They can't make me eat fruit!! I will have oreos just because I can! In fact, living alone is a lot like being a kid whose parents are on vacation. I leave my shoes by the door because it's not going to annoy mom and I stay up way too late emailing because no one's going to tell me to go to bed. I guess when you're a kid doing things like leaving your clothes all over the room when mom and dad are away is a way to silently claim a bit of independence. You're still completely dependent, but for that one weekend, concerning that one little matter, no one can tell you differently. For me, that's independence. And, so on this wonderfully empty Saturday morning, I got up late and declared my independence by eating oreos for breakfast.

my new vocabulary word

Tonight, we were sitting at the Cheesecake factory, staring at the bizarreness that is their architecture (did I spell that wrong?) when someone said that there is a term in architectural/design circles called suburban gaudy. I love it! That's exactly what I hate about the suburbs... the plasticity and the suburban gaudy element. I am putting that into my regular vocabulary rotation.

the corruption of small children

I think I may have corrupted some small children this evening on my commute home. I was sitting on one of those cement slabs they call benches at Metro Center waiting for a train when a cute little family of four came up and sat down. The father walked away to check the value on his smarttrip card and the little girl, who looked to be about 5, seemed quite concerned that he was going to miss the train. She heard the trains underneath us and was looking for the train and seemed confused when no trains showed up. So, I, in my father's tradition of talking to anyone within earshot, said to the girl, "There are trains underneath us, too. Did you hear a train?" She looked frightened and ran over to her mother. The little boy (about 3, maybe) turned to his mother and said, "May I speak to the stranger?" When she said, "yes", they both started up a conversation with me that was quite entertaining to me since I rarely talk to anyone under 18, but the mother scolded, "Now let her read her newspaper." I don't know...maybe I shouldn't make a habit of talking to random little kids, but they're kids!! How can you resist? I suppose I should have known they employed peculiar parenting strategies when I overheard the mother say, "What word are you not going to say anymore?" to which the little boy answered, "kill". I suppose they will outlaw the words "lie, cheat, rape, sex, and shoot", too.

Atlantis II

I talked to a friend of mine, well, ex-boyfriend, really, from New Orleans East. He's not expecting to have an apartment left and certainly not a car. He is sure that his family's home is ruined. One of his closest friends freaked out and jumped out of the Superdome to his own death. He told me that he is not going back. So, now he has to reinvent his life. Find a new job, a new city, a new life, really. The good news is that his whole family was able to leave and get to Texas safely. The bad news, of course, is that his life will never be the same. But, maybe that's the good news. I certainly hope that he reinvents himself in a really fabulous way. When we were talking tonight, he said that he had decided something come hell or high water...and high water definitely came first! It seems almost sinister to make light of it, but I think he was glad to have someone make him laugh. He said, "How appropriate that such a bizarre little city would end up a cross between the lost city Atlantis and the Iraq battlefield."

I know that he loved (and hated) that city, though, so I know it will be difficult.

The strangeness of living in DC

I'm still struck by the strangeness of living in DC. I've been here six months, but it is still weird to look down a random street and see the dome of the Capitol building (which I do frequently since I live just a few stone throws away). I mean as a child I learned the difference between capitol and capital because the capitol has a round dome...like the letter o is round. Now it's part of my daily routine. The other night, I went to a grocery store I had never been to before and when I was approaching it, I looked down a street and saw a great view of the Washington monument. At just about the same time, I realized that the store I was walking to is in Watergate. Things that once were very abstract concepts are now concrete locales in my life, literally. Weird.

Ok, blogger somehow lost the first blog I created, so hopefully, this one sticks. This is going to be mainly for those people I love that live in faraway places... Tia in Hawaii, Colleen and Nathaniel in Seoul, my family in Pheonix, Krissy in Alexandria...and also for my mental health, particularly when I don't have my journal.
Tonight when I was walking home, I had the thought that I am getting good at living without friends. That sounds really pathetic, but maybe it's good. Maybe at some point, unmarried people just learn how to live without friends and lovers and it's okay. I mean I find ways to keep myself busy, but I'm not engaging in deep friendships. That's different for me and I long for that in a way, but at the same time, I feel so socially awkward right now that I can't imagine forging a below-the-surface relationship.
Maybe I just need to chill out and do some serious God-searching. I know that when I focus on the right things, I have the most joy and yet my focus so often shifts to other things... like gobs. mmmm.... gobs.
In other news, the Steelers lost a preseason game last night. I was there. I'm starting to think I'm bad luck. They lost the last one I went to, too.